Through the Terrains with Jesus | 011
Here I am, once again, visiting the doctor to ensure I am getting better. A regular beautiful day it was. But that suddenly changed when the doctor began to explain what would happen next.
“Next?? Is this a must be done or a choice because I am not sure about it, I need to pray about this.” Those were the words I told the doctor.
I can’t make a rash decision just right there. I needed to pray on it and hear what it was I needed to do. My husband and I weren’t feeling this was the choice but here we are, calling two friends to pray with us on this and ask the Lord for clarity and direction.
There I was, seeking His counsel, asking Him what it was HE wanted me to do.
The doctor continued to schedule the procedure to be done regardless, all within that week. But as I researched myself about this certain procedure the doctor wanted done and felt was best, inside I felt it wasn’t the best thing to do.
For those few days, four days to be exact, I prayed seeking His answer on it. But I couldn’t seem to hear his answer. As I texted a friend, she began to say she heard the Lord say “she knows my answer, don’t tell her what it is, I already gave her the answer.”
I sat with the Lord asking Him, “what was the answer? I didn’t hear you. Share with me again what it is.”
And right there, I began to call the doctor and tell him, we need to reschedule this procedure because I am not feeling comfortable at this moment with this answer and I want to ensure this is what I truly need.
Talk about faith friend. Now you may think I am so kind of weirdo or what not, for postponing this procedure… but deep inside, I didn’t feel it was right to go through. But my mind was too clouded to hear the Lord’s answer.
I had no idea what would come from this. I had no idea what my answer was honestly. I began to wonder and wander…. I began to freak out to be honest because I felt I needed the answer right now, in this instant.
And in this case, it was given, but in a new way that I never knew he would speak to me through.
We become so use to one way how he speaks to us, and that is okay! But there are times when we walk in these terrains that he shows us, there are many ways he can speak to us through. Whether its nature, gardening, through a friend, a song, a bible verse, numbers, or even the heart gut feeling inside that we know.. with no doubt…
The only way I could hear his answer is by truly tuning into Him and shutting out other voices. See, I wanted someone else to hear for me but God was saying “I am the one to speak to you.”
I wish I could’ve changed that moment and saw what it was he was trying to show me in that instant moment.. but it took me a few days to see it.
“Lord, I’m sorry, for trying to hurry the process and know what to do. I want to know if this procedure is what you want me to do and if so, I will go through with it. And if it isn’t, I will not, I will stand in faith.”
The gentle answer he spoke of what He wanted me to do was loud enough for me to know it was Him.
We tend to not hear his voice because we are clouded by other voices, and this is where we must have the discernment to know what to do and how to clear out those other voices.
It wasn’t wrong for me to ask for prayer from a friend. But there are times God wants just us. Only us, to hear what He has to say because its a secret, confident, building our trust with Him and in hearing Him.
Where do we run to first when we need that answer in such a short amount of time?
How do we feel when we haven’t received the answer right away? Do we let anxiety and worry begin to flow through, do we jump the gun and go forth, or do we release it all and say “okay lord I trust you to give me the answer you want to give me”?
In that time and place, I have learned:
Trusting His timing more timely than my own.
Trusting that His plan is already paved.
Trusting and knowing that He won’t leave me.
Trusting that He is for me, never against me.
Trusting that His voice is what matters and what I desire the most to hear. Not of others.
To not let worry or fear or even anxiety try to take over but instead, releasing it to Him and trusting, in patience, He will give an answer.
It is a learning process, but I am learning beautiful things in this process as I walk this terrain with Jesus. What about you?