The Compelling Love of the Father’s Embrace

“The enemy wants to throw your circumstances in your face while God wants to show you his glory in them.” -SWHW

I‘m embarrassed to say that I slipped into a place of dark thoughts without realizing I did. Embarrassed to admit to you, dear friend, that I tripped and fell into the pit the enemy wanted me in. Where the enemy laughs thinking he snared me in and had me there, there God was, reaching out to my hand, grabbing it and pulling me out of it. Reminding me of who He is.

What I share with you may sound silly, but to me, it was heart wrecking.

I thought I found my place in friends. I thought I found the community my heart had craved for. After all, God loves community and fellowship right? 

Until I was dropped like a ball from the people I poured my heart and soul into. Sharing my deepest darkest secrets, tears and time.

Taking time out of my day, months, hours, to hear them because my love for them. It never bothered me, but rather, my heart wanted to be there for them because of the love I have for them.

I, also, shared my struggles and heartaches with them as my heart grew to placing my trust in them. 

Until I was randomly not spoken to anymore only to leave me wondering what is wrong with me? 
The dark plaguing thoughts of, why didn’t they stay? Did I say something I shouldn’t have? Words of conviction I spoke to them, only of what the Lord told me to speak to them on, could this be it Lord?

Only then did I realize something deeper that the Lord had to show me in it.

But before He could show me and tell me, He allowed me to cry, weep, grieve, feel the heartache and pain of it all. He listened to my deepest anguish place of that dark place. Where I was sitting in this “muddy pit” it seemed, of feeling abandoned and useless, there He was reaching his hand out to mine.

A deep compelling love of the Father embracing me once again in my hurt and pain.

I wish life could be lived without pain and heartache. Without the hurt and grief. But not having these things, we wouldn’t appreciate life at all. The friends we once had or the family we do have.

In fact, Jesus even said we wouldn’t have a troubled free life, but rather the opposite.

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33

Yes Jesus may be referring to trials and tribulations in this verse, but He is also referring to so much more. Things we will deal with while living on this side of heaven. But to not worry, fear, or be dismayed for He has overcome the world and He has much peace to give us. In Him.

To even admit to you kills me inside. But to be totally honest with you, this is where I was for a little while. In a place the Lord allowed me to walk in and experience all to experience more of His comfort and healing.

If I never would have experienced the “drop”, I would not know more of His comfort to extend to those who have been dropped too.
If I never would have experienced the “heartache” in it, I would not know more of His healing touch to extend that onto others.

Now, in no way am I saying it is okay, people are people. Seasons change. People change. Life changes. And that’s a great thing!

While being in that place, the Lord’s compelling love met my heartache and answered me in my distress. He showed me my heart and theirs. He began to show me that my foundation and roots are to not be in people, friendships or community but in Christ alone. Reminding me of who I am and what He has called me to do. Friendships are gifts. Treasured gifts. There are ups and downs, meaning, there will be disagreements but never fights. There will be questioning, but never rudeness. There will be grace, mercy, and compassion much like Jesus. And friendships, they are just that. Representing the friendship of the Lord.

Not to replace the Lord but to reflect Christ’s friendship with us, His people.

In that hurting place, God met me there. Reminding me He is El Roi, the God who sees it all. Sees me in my pain and hurt. Who is there for me, mending my heart back to whole. All while the Holy Spirit ministers to me, reminding me of verses to overcome those toxic thoughts, (hint, it’s one of the reasons I created the free Bible Study Guide).

When we get hurt, we begin to dwell on questions. Wondering and pondering, thinking and suddenly coming up with scenarios that play in our head that should not be.

We must take them to the Lord. Every question. Every tear. Every hurt. Every pain. Every bit of it and allow Him to speak to us. Allowing Him to show us what He wants to show us in this place.

The enemy so desperately wants you chained and shackled to the imprisonment of abandonment and useless-ness. But God is saying otherwise.

Place your foundation in Christ alone and you will not be shaken.

Place your identity in Christ alone and you will not be torn down.

Place your heart into the hands of Christ and allow Him to lead you along the way.

There is healing, mending and restoration. Question is, are we willing to receive it?

Seasons come and go as some friendships do. But there are those few, those godly friendships who stay and battle with you in your battles, pray for you in your times of much needed prayer. Who help bring you back to Christ when you are falling and slowly drifting. Who speak life in situations that seem lifeless. Who offer comfort as the Father offers comfort. Never to replace the Father but to extend it knowing they have walked it too.

Friend, if you have been hurt by friendships, can I tell you this one thing? Don’t place a wall upon your heart. The enemy will work hard at trying to get you to not open up to anyone again. He will try so hard to steer you away from community leaving you to think it’ll happen again.

Don’t fall in that trap. I was once there. Although I did open up and let that wall down, there are no promises of not getting hurt again. Because I did. But I am okay. And so will you be. The Lord is our friend. He is our Shepherd. He is our everything we need, Psalm 23.

There will come a time where you will have a faith-based, Christ foundational friendship. It will come. Pray and ask the Lord to bring these friends to you. He knows you need friends and community. But while in the waiting for friendships, seek Jesus first, always. And then be that friend unto others. The very friend you need.

Reflection questions

Have you felt abandoned by a person you loved deeply? 

Maybe you felt the excruciating pain of that hurt.

Have you came across a time to put up a wall to never trust anyone again?

I get it all friend. But moreso, Jesus gets it all, all the more. And He doesn’t turn his face away in our hurting place. Let’s turn to Him today.