Stewarding our Parenting
Last week’s article was Stewarding our Marriage. This week we will be talking on stewarding our parenting.
Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
Now that we covered two main topics, our time with God and marriage, we can now move forward to a subject that is a bit challenging in some areas. Parenting.
“Our parenting should reflect the heart of our Father extending the same grace, mercy, discipline, compassion and love as He does us.”
Stewarding our parenting isn’t to be a perfect parent or a know it all parent. It’s to steward our parenting well. Training up our child in the way they should go, in the Lords way. So when they get older and encounter trials, sufferings, hardships in life, their boats won’t sink knowing they have been taught within their home by both example and in the Word.
But how do we do this? How can we “train” our child? Is it possible?
Very much so! Stewarding our parenting is teaching our children daily, sitting around the table, going to bed, taking walks at the park, all of the Word.
You shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. Deuteronomy 11:19
We must block time out of our day to spend time with our children. To teach our children. It is not the school churches job to raise our children nor teach them full time. As a parent, it is our God given responsibility to show our children with our own walk and actions. Though we do need the help from others to teach them, it solely is our responsibility to teach them in the Lords way. The past two articles on the stewardship series we learned how to structure our time with God and with our marriage. Now we can learn to structure our time with our children.
How does your day look? Is it too busy? Is it filled with things you wish it weren’t filled with? We must learn to restructure our schedule sister. We need to fit our kids in and show them that we care. Limit our screen times, be more present, talk more about God, and include them in everything we do, if at all possible.
Our children need us parents now more than ever. With a twisted generation and watered down gospel being proclaimed, the world’s mantra of, “do what you love and put yourself first…” we must step in to show them the Lords way.
I know you probably think you aren’t qualified to do this parenting thing. I know you probably think you don’t have the answers. I know you probably think “how could I ever… what if I mess up?” Well… let me begin by saying this quote below:
“Principle: God never calls you to a task without giving you what you need to do it. He never sends you without going with you.” Paul David Tripp
We are not qualified, we learn with the Holy Spirit.
You don’t have all the answers, the Holy Spirit does.
You will mess up, but by the power of the Holy Spirit, keeping in step with Him and walking with Him, He leads and teaches us along the way.
Each child requires different tasks, different conversations, different love attributes from us. Have you ever heard of the 5 love languages? Have you tired this with your marriage? Well it also is for children. When we begin to see our children, we learn of them and we see what love language theirs is and we fill their love tank with the love language they need.
Just the other day, my oldest daughter who is fifteen, wanted to go to walmart with me. She wanted just me and her. Of course I couldn’t leave our newest baby we had at home, i brought her with me and she slept all in the store. But before that, I picked up a starbucks drink for us and just walked walmart to get our groceries. My other children, they want either a book read to to sit and play imagination.
Now I know it can be hard if you have more then two kids, but if we can just try it incorporate them in our daily tasks, without it seeming as a “chore,” they are spending time with you and you can speak the Word of the Lord to their hearts.
Our children need us parents. Some show it, some don’t. Some outgrow hugs and kisses and some do not. But if we can learn our children daily, see them and what they like and don’t like, we can steward our children, our parenting well.
We always want to point our children to Christ, never ourselves. We don’t want to make ourselves a god but always pointing them to the only God in whom we serve.
Sit with your spouse. Ask how he wants to parent them and you share with him how you want to parent them also. Pray on it. Speak about it. Limit screen times so you guys can be more present with one another. What we do is have board games on certain days, for example, Tuesdays is board game night. Friday’s is family movie night. Thursdays is breakfast for dinner… etc. We try to make it fun for the kids and include them. Parenting isn’t all about discipline. It’s about including them in your home, sharing the gospel at home, teaching them firmly with both grace and truth in your home. It’s showing them you fall and make mistakes, you ask for forgiveness and it sets the tone for them to come to the Father doing the same.
In my experience with our 7 kiddos, I have learned that once you get one stage down, a new stage already has occurred and so you have to learn this new stage too. And with each stage requires daily grace for both ourselves and our children.
There is never a day I don’t need God’s grace. We could never outgrow God’s grace, neither do our children.
now its your turn
Take a minute today and look at your schedule. View your children and begin to see what their love language is. Block times in the week to spend time with them and to share with your husband your heart for parenting the children.
Take 15 minutes today and pray to the Lord asking Him how He wants you to parent them.
reflection questions
What areas do you need to illuminate to incorporate your children? Example, you like your towels folded this certain way so you don’t invite your children to help because they don’t do it right. Or you don’t ask for help from them because you are use to doing everything on your own.
What can change within your parenting?
How do you view parenting?
What is your main goal for your children in parenting?
let us pray
“Abba father, thank you for leading me and guiding me in parenting. I don’t know what I am doing or if I am even doing it right. I need you wisdom and guidance for my children. Lead me and direct my steps for my children. I lay my tasks and expectations on parenting so I can parent the way you want me to parent my children. For you know their hearts, I don’t. You know them more than I. Father, help me to steward my parenting well by not over disciplining or lacking in discipline. Help me to see, to view, and to know my child’s love language so that I can fill their tank in the most healthy way. And help me to always, always point them to you never myself as their god. In Jesus name, amen.”