El Roi – The God Who Sees
I can honestly tell you that this very chair you see in the photo was exactly how I felt in my season of suffering and distress. Maybe you felt this way before, or even now?
Walking such sufferings, or places, can be challenging, lonely and testing.
My husband and I have wept over and over and over again in such walks of our life. Even just last night when our son was starting to feel icky once again, I saw fear trying to paralyze my husband and captivate him in ways only satan can do. But I knew, with the stance I carried, the Lord upheld me again.
“Stand strong.” It’s what I always hear from the Lord when we encounter such walks.
How can anyone stand strong in places that make them fall? Especially when it comes to your spouse or children?
I can’t be the only one whose heart breaks in a million pieces when my children suffer and my husband in desperation of answers. I felt this peace overwhelm me, helping me to stay calm and recite scripture. Continually calling my son’s name to snap out of it and to speak Gods Word over Him and this situation. I don’t ignore what happens. I know such things occur out of our control. But I have learned throughout these couple of years, in this suffering place, more of spiritual warfare and how to defeat warfare. Of course not in my own strength. We should never try to defeat spiritual warfare in our own strength, we have none and it’s dangerous. It is only by the leading of the Holy Spirit and the Word of God that becomes our weapon and sword. Much like Jesus, who was led by the Holy Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by satan, Jesus quoted Scripture to defeat satan’s plan. You can read the story in Matthew 4:1-11.
I have seen quite a bit of spiritual warfare in my short years of following Jesus.
Even more-so now that the Lord still has me studying the Book of Job. Can you believe it’s been a year that He has me reading Job? I’m not complaining because in all honesty, I relate to this story, and Job to the finest details. I can understand Job and his wailing and cries. Questions and lamenting. I see the things stolen, robbed from this man of integrity. A man who faithfully served and loved the Lord. I get it all because we are in the thicket of it.
But as I read it further in detail, the Lord began to have me see the outside view of it. Of how the Lord indeed does allow such hardships, trials, and tests to occur. He does indeed allow such things to happen to us to mature us, grow us, and know Him more. When we think we know the Lord, we have it all wrong. There is so much to know about the Lord. A lifetime of living for Him to know more and more of who He is. Even the christian who has walked all his life with the Lord still gets to know him more. And what a beauty that is to have in this life til we graduate to Heaven.
I never discredit the Lord in our sufferings and never do I curse Him in our pain. I cry immensely in it and share with him my frustrations, pain, sorrows, and hurt. Shouldn’t we all do that in our distressed times? Why must it be so hard for some to let it all out and be completely vulnerable and honest? Could it be because of our past or what we’ve been taught all along? Could it be out of fear that he will turn away and not listen? Could it be because we think “surely we have no right to share this to our God.”
Where we don’t be honest and share our deepest longings, needs, pain,, hurt and frustrations, it is there where we lack our trust in the Lord.
I often hear others get so mad when they walk such sufferings and never want to talk about the Lord. They shut it off and cut the conversation completely. Why is that? Because they allow the root of bitterness to linger never wanting to fully trust in the Lord. They don’t want to address the fact that they are angry this occurrence is happening. Frustrated at wanting to know the full plan He has.
But that is just it. We cannot know his plans. Not all at least. Yes he will share with us some things, but there is so much we do not know or will not know and we must learn to be okay with that and trust Him anyway.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9 ESV
Now am I saying it will be easy? Absolutely not! But it will get easier the more we lean unto the Lord in such turmoiled circumstances.
This is how I felt and learned. To lean more unto Him in such hard times. Leaning onto my husband and the Lord. Trusting in the Sovereignty of the Lord. That even though it hurts and is painful and I do not quite understand why He brings us through such hard things, I must trust Him anyway. Why? Because I know what it’s like to live without God and what it’s like to live with Him. I choose the latter.
The story of Job and Hagar (Genesis 16) has stood out to me in ways that a story stands out to a child, intrigued. As I read more of Hagar and how distressed she was, I saw how the Lord saw her and met her there in it. He saw her pain and tears. He heard it all. Same as Job. Though the Lord was silent in times they sought Him, the Lord showed up. And this is where it wrecked me with tears flooding through.
El Roi. The God who sees. He saw Hagar and He saw Job. Though He was silent, He still saw them through all they were facing. And I knew the Lord saw me in my distress, pain, and sufferings. And He confirmed it the other night.
I had a dream. A beautiful dream of what is to come for my family after all we suffered and lost. You can read further of my heart on what I shared, God Our Restorer. He shared a glimpse of what He is restoring and the beauty that is unexplainable. The finest details that left me in awe, knowing He heard our wailing, cries, lamenting, and saw our sufferings. He heard me. Saw me. And met me there. He has a plan. A good plan. Nothing we faced and went through was wasted.
And friend, this is who He is. The God who sees us in our distress. In our pain. Sufferings. Trials and trenches. He sees it all. Even when nobody else is there. Even when no one else understands. Even when all others leave. He never leaves and sees you.
A great comfort we get to delight in knowing He comforts us in our afflictions, “who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” 2 Corinthians 1:4 ESV,
“who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” NKJV
Sufferings, trials, tests, hardships, unforeseen circumstances are not enjoyable. They are not. They do not even feel good. But, in them all, we can take heart knowing we walk with the One who has walked them all, Jesus. We can take heart knowing He has overcome the world, John 16:33. We can take heart knowing He is our Great Shepherd who leads us to still waters for replenishing, Psalm 23. And we can take great delight in knowing we can rejoice in our trials and sufferings knowing it brings our Abba Father glory, and us maturing in Christ, becoming more and more like Him, James 1:2-4.
May your view of your circumstance be viewed through the lens and eyes of our Father, knowing He is El Roi, the God who sees you in your distress, heartache, suffering and trials.